Angels at War
by Lilas
Summary: One of the G-boys remembers his first life and reminisces on it... I'm really not sure what this should be, so I put it as PG13... ^^;;


Disclaimer: Don't own them, but you already know that. 

Author's notes: Tell me what you think… There isn't much to say except that this could probably go for any of the G-boys… But if you must have someone, I was picturing Heero while writing this… Now go ahead and READ!!! 

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Angels at War 

By: Lilas 

For some reason, I've always preferred the sunrise from the sunset... I remember sitting on the puffiest cloud I could find and just stare at the awakening sky. Just stare at the beginning of another day, another morning, another life... I know most people think the sunset is more romantic, but I wasn't looking for something romantic since I didn't have a date... I guess I was looking for forgiveness in a way, for something new... 

I suppose I should introduce myself, right? You're probably wondering if I'm nuts or something. My name is… My name was Azure and I was an angel, a War Angel to be more precise… I know, 'But what's a war angel?' Well, when heaven went into war with whomever, I'd fight. It was that simple… no more no less. 

So during four thousand years, I killed people… No, allow me to rephrase that. I killed beings. Demons created by Lucifer, devils working for Lucifer, and the list goes on… My whole life was nothing but a repetitive circle of fighting and killing over and over again… I guess that's why I always enjoyed the sunrise more… 

I had heard a long time ago by a friend of mine that died in war that if you looked at the sunrise enough, you could see the humans' souls coming to find their eternal peace in heaven… And he was right. After I began doing my sunrise watch, I saw shadows in the horizon… Human souls coming to heaven for their deserved rest. And I knew from that moment on that it was for these souls who had a miserable life from the beginning that we fought and died and existed. 

But many of my friends warned me that I should have stopped while I still could, but I didn't understand why so I continued watching the souls pass by. Some even smiled or waved at me while others passed me by without a stare… But I didn't really care. Watching them pass by gave me a reason to still fight. 

Until she came along… After that, my life was a living hell, so to speak. 

See we have certain rules that we have to follow or else. One of them being that an angel is not allowed to have a relationship with a human soul… It wasn't bad enough that I had already broken the rules of having dark wings, a golden armor and an energy sword instead of a bow and arrow, but my heart just had to go and break another one… 

Personally, I never understood why I couldn't have black wings or an energy sword… But the no human/angel relationship law was one of the most important of all besides the 'Thou shall not join with Lucifer' kind of law. The reason for that one was that a human soul, after being released from the body, was pure in every possible way and they could only get into heaven by remaining pure. 

So, those who went to hell or purgatory were souls that did something after leaving the body… Like trying to get back in the body, or trying to get revenge on someone that did something to them… Those kinds of souls, you know? 

I know I should have kept my own business that day… I almost didn't make it for the sunrise because of the war we had had the day before. I was actually supposed to go clean my wings from the bloodstains but I skipped that to go watch the sunrise, figuring I could do that later. Yes, I was addicted to the sunrise… It was just so beautiful from up there… 

Then, as all the souls passed by, this one female soul stopped… I mean just stopped in the middle of thousands, and stared at me. I mean, the kind of stare you only get when you know you've found that one person. That was the kind of stare she was giving me beside all the blood on me, beside my awful appearance that day… 

When I realized she was coming towards me, I remember hearing my whole body screaming 'Get your ass away from here!' It was the kind of scream that your body does when it knows something bad is going to happen… When all it wants is to get away, fly away, disappear away… die away. But there's always that one little powerful part of you that says 'No, stay. You know you want this, you know this is right even though it is beyond wrong.' 

So I stayed where I was, watching as the beautiful soul approached me, fully aware I had just ruined her previous life, her afterlife and all her lives to come… But I didn't care. I was being selfish, I know, but I didn't give a shit. She was the reason I was still alive after four thousand years, why I watched the sunrise all this time… Why I had lost the fear of breaking and bending the rules… 

I had only heard rumors about what happened to angels who fell in love with a soul… According to them, depending on the love, they would either spend eternity meeting each other, falling in love but never being together, being reborn every time to go through the same cycle over and over… Or they would be forgiven and in one of their lives, get together… And after finally being reunited, and only after that, would they both enter heaven holding hands. 

At least that's what I had heard… It didn't sound too bad. Well it sounded much better than spending eternity killing beings to protect this one place I knew I didn't even belong in. So as she approached me, her hair blowing in the transparent wind, her long dress flying and losing itself in her ankles, I prayed and I begged and I pleaded with all my being, all my heart and all my soul that we'd eventually end up together. Because I knew that once she touched me and once we kissed, our spiritual love would be engraved and we would be reborn over and over and over again until we ended up together in heaven… 

So here I am today, my spirit flying in the eternal beauty of the sunrise, all the memories of my lives before this one invading my spiritual being as I recalled our very first kiss as souls… As I remembered my friends' frightened and disappointed faces when they learned what I had done… And as I recalled having heard this voice assuring us that we would get together one day… 

At that moment I looked sideways and saw my hand in my lover's, her hand holding me by her tightly. Suddenly, I didn't feel like my life as a Gundam pilot had been a total hell after I had admitted my feelings towards her… As I looked to the other side, I saw a solitary angel sitting on cloud, watching with eyes akin to the ones I had once had, as the souls flew by. 

And then I realized that this whole rule of angels and souls not being able to be together didn't matter. I realized that there always was going to be this one angel who broke all the rules to risk all his lives to find his one destined soul mate from spirit… That me being here today, going back to my home not as a lonely angel, but as a whole spirit meant that we were always forgiven… That we always had a second chance and that the motive we were endlessly being reborn was so we could accomplish what we did not in the previous life… 

That me being happy at this moment meant that if we truly did manage to end up with the one we loved and belonged with… We would with no doubt be forgiven for our stubbornness at eternal happiness. 

But you wanna know what I really missed in this whole ordeal? Being able to annoy my commanding angel with my black sword… 

Maybe in my next life… 


End file.
